Orchid XP v3 wrote:
>>> I fail to see how getting a place of my own is going to help in any
>>> way, shape or form.
>>
>> Grown up women in the UK generally don't mind that their potential
>> boyfriend live with his mother?
>
> Well, I'm 27, she's 25, not sure if that qualifies as "grown up".

Let me put it another way. For women who have moved out from home 
themselves, do they generally don't mind that their potential boyfriend 
still live with his mother?

Do the women you've been interested in live by their parents?

> Housing prices in the UK are currently astronomical.

Renting an apartment is not an option then? What do other young people your 
age in the UK do?

Rune
-- 
http://runevision.com

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Rune wrote:

>>> Grown up women in the UK generally don't mind that their potential
>>> boyfriend live with his mother?
>> Well, I'm 27, she's 25, not sure if that qualifies as "grown up".
> 
> Let me put it another way. For women who have moved out from home 
> themselves, do they generally don't mind that their potential boyfriend 
> still live with his mother?

Well, none of the ones I've spoken to seemed to mind.

> Do the women you've been interested in live by their parents?

Let me count... 3 did, 3 didn't.

>> Housing prices in the UK are currently astronomical.
> 
> What do other young people your age in the UK do?

You're asking *me*?

-- 
http://blog.orphi.me.uk/

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Brian Elliott wrote:

>> Well, I'm 27, she's 25, not sure if that qualifies as "grown up".
> 
> Eh???  Helloo??!!  Yes Andrew, twenty-five is VERY grown 
> up. Childhood and teenage are far gone for both of you.

Well, I guess maybe you could say I'm in "denial" or something.

I really hate being old. I'd much rather be a teenager again...

As a teenager, it's considered "normal" to date girls. As an adult, I 
just feel like a dirty old man when I even contemplate interacting with 
girls. :-(

> Sometimes, you say things that are so gauche, they're unintentionally 
> funny and child-like.  Unfortunately, that's because you've experienced 
> nothing of the adult's world, and that's because you 're still at home, 
> in your bedroom, being cared for by Mum.

Cared for? Heck, this month I think I've seen her about 3 times. The 
rest of the time she isn't even here! Heh. (For example, while I've been 
suffering with this cold, she's been in north Wales. Suffering even 
more, no doubt... When she left, there wasn't even any food in the house.)

(I don't know about the adult's world - I haven't seen the child's one yet!)

>> Housing prices in the UK are currently astronomical.
> 
> Yes, buying is getting hard and harder.  I agree totally.  But that 
> doesn't justify a strategy of "give up".

I did actually go to the trouble of going to see a finance advisor to 
see what the story really is. I was expecting him to say that something 
could be done (after all, that way he gets to sell me a product). But 
no. Apparently I simply don't earn enough money.

> What happened to the job 
> replacement search?  That story's gone quiet for a while.

That came to a halt because I just don't know where to go next.

I started out by writing a CV. I know how to do that. And there are 
people who will give you advice and so forth on that. If I know what to 
do, I can do it.

But then it came to the actual searching for jobs part. And that I've 
never known how to do. And I still don't know how to do it. I've looked 
in all the obvious places - the local paper, the local paper's website, 
various heavily advertised job websites. I can't find anything remotely 
similar to what I'm looking for. So, basically, I'm completely stuck, 
and I don't know what to do next.

> You've got to do *something*!  Rent a room, live in a caravan, live in a 
> tent, live in a hostel, share accomodation.

Hmm. Sleep in a tent and die of hypothermia, or live in a perfectly good 
house? Gee, let me think...

No, if I'm going to move out, I need a *real* place to stay. Doesn't 
need to be a place, but it at least needs to be SAFE.

> If you carry on with the 
> "do nothing" option as it seems now, soon you will be 30 and still under 
> Mum's care.  People will think you are one of those mentally retarded 
> kids who HAVE TO be cared for by their parents after they're adults.

I suppose technically they'd be right...

> And doesn't your Mum deserve a break?

Heh. The day I move out (assuming it ever comes), she will be utterly 
devestated. Once I leave, she will be financially ruined, and she will 
be utterly alone. She's such an obnoxious women that she doesn't have 
any "friends", so she will just sit by herself watching TV with nobody 
to tell what a crappy day she had.

I, on the other hand, won't have to put up with some person periodically 
storming in and ruining my life... Ah, it will be bliss! If only I knew 
how...

-- 
http://blog.orphi.me.uk/

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Orchid XP v3 wrote:
> Well, I finally managed to get back in contact. My joy was short-lived 
> though. Apparently in "the next month or so" she's moving house to a 
> place many hours' drive from here.
> 
> I feel sick. Physically.
> 
> Life is just so violently unfair. The ONLY thing I want in this world is 
> to have a girlfriend. And no matter what I do, this goal remains 
> completely unattainable.
> 
> I feel so miserable right now...

For crying out loud, start a profile at www.okcupid.com and find someone 
else!

Regards,
John

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John VanSickle wrote:

>> I feel so miserable right now...
> 
> For crying out loud, start a profile at www.okcupid.com and find someone 
> else!

Ah yes, join yet another dating website. I'm sure that'll solve 
everything...

-- 
http://blog.orphi.me.uk/

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On Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:36:44 +0100, Orchid XP v3 wrote:

> I can't find anything remotely
> similar to what I'm looking for. So, basically, I'm completely stuck,
> and I don't know what to do next.

You've had advice to expand your search to include things that you know 
and are good at but don't value.  Start there.

Jim

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Jim Henderson wrote:
> On Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:36:44 +0100, Orchid XP v3 wrote:
> 
>> I can't find anything remotely
>> similar to what I'm looking for. So, basically, I'm completely stuck,
>> and I don't know what to do next.
> 
> You've had advice to expand your search to include things that you know 
> and are good at but don't value.  Start there.

I don't think you understand.

In all the looking I've done, I have yet to find a single job where I 
can even say "hey, I could probably do that job". Never mind one where 
I'd *want* to do that...

There's really no point applying for a job you know you can't do. 
(Unless you enjoy proving to yourself how much you fail...)

-- 
http://blog.orphi.me.uk/

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Orchid XP v3 wrote:
> Jim Henderson wrote:
>> On Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:36:44 +0100, Orchid XP v3 wrote:
>>
>>> I can't find anything remotely
>>> similar to what I'm looking for. So, basically, I'm completely stuck,
>>> and I don't know what to do next.
>>
>> You've had advice to expand your search to include things that you 
>> know and are good at but don't value.  Start there.
> 
> I don't think you understand.
> 
> In all the looking I've done, I have yet to find a single job where I 
> can even say "hey, I could probably do that job". Never mind one where 
> I'd *want* to do that...
Do I need to remind you that you very much restricted yourself 
geographically?

> 
> There's really no point applying for a job you know you can't do. 
> (Unless you enjoy proving to yourself how much you fail...)
>

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On Tue, 25 Sep 2007 22:09:48 +0100, Orchid XP v3 wrote:

> Jim Henderson wrote:
>> On Tue, 25 Sep 2007 21:36:44 +0100, Orchid XP v3 wrote:
>> 
>>> I can't find anything remotely
>>> similar to what I'm looking for. So, basically, I'm completely stuck,
>>> and I don't know what to do next.
>> 
>> You've had advice to expand your search to include things that you know
>> and are good at but don't value.  Start there.
> 
> I don't think you understand.
> 
> In all the looking I've done, I have yet to find a single job where I
> can even say "hey, I could probably do that job". Never mind one where
> I'd *want* to do that...

That's because you don't give yourself the credit for your skills that 
you deserve.  We've been down this discussion before...

> There's really no point applying for a job you know you can't do.
> (Unless you enjoy proving to yourself how much you fail...)

Um, the job I have now is a job I would've said I was absolutely *not* 
qualified to do - because it's essentially a people management position.  
(It's actually a programs management position, but there are over a 
thousand people in the programs).  I got it because I was being laid off 
due to cutbacks, and a VP provided me with a safety net because he had a 
need he thought I could fill.

I've been here two years, and so far, it's the best job I've ever had.  
Turns out I am qualified to do it, I just didn't think I was.

So, so much for *that* logic. ;-)

Jim

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Orchid XP v3 wrote:
> Rune wrote:
> 
>>>> Grown up women in the UK generally don't mind that their potential
>>>> boyfriend live with his mother?
>>> Well, I'm 27, she's 25, not sure if that qualifies as "grown up".
>>
>> Let me put it another way. For women who have moved out from home 
>> themselves, do they generally don't mind that their potential 
>> boyfriend still live with his mother?
> 
> Well, none of the ones I've spoken to seemed to mind.
> 
>> Do the women you've been interested in live by their parents?
> 
> Let me count... 3 did, 3 didn't.
> 
>>> Housing prices in the UK are currently astronomical.
>>
>> What do other young people your age in the UK do?
> 
> You're asking *me*?

We rent. Buying often doesn't become an option without pooling 
resources, be that with parents, partner or friend. There's some pretty 
silly lending going on at the moment which makes buying easier but I'm 
personally steering clear at the moment (I have many friends and 
relatives earning no more than me who have dived into it with glee, 
however).

Renting need not be expensive, especially since you're well outside 
London and have no intention of going there, although to maximise your 
value-for-money you'd probably have to share a place.

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