On Sun, 07 Jun 2015 12:46:53 +0100, Orchid Win7 v1 wrote:

> On 05/06/2015 06:14 AM, Jim Henderson wrote:
> 
>> Very sorry to hear this, Andrew.
> 
> Yeah. What else is there to say?
> 
> Suffice it to say that I've never experienced death before. My grandad
> isn't dead of course - but he looks so frail now...

I know the feeling - went through that with my dad about 10 years ago.

>>> It's rather frightening to think that some day soon, it will be me
>>> sitting in that hospital bed, knowing that the end is near, and that
>>> there's nothing that anybody can do about it. Damn, I've wasted my
>>> life!
>>
>> Hopefully not next week.  But as Stephen says, do things now that you
>> don't want to look back on and regret not doing.
> 
> If life were that simple, I would have done these things already.

Well, of course life isn't simple, but it's simpler than most people 
think it is.  The thing is, you don't truly know that until you get 
older.  That's something I've learned probably over the last 10 or 15 
years - I used to think the way you did - life is complicated.

It really isn't.  Yes, you need money to do stuff, and yes, arranging 
time off is a challenge.

I've got a coworker who's just getting started in her career - she's in 
her mid-20s.  Right now, she's touring Europe for a month.  She's not 
taking every day off - and is working while traveling, but she's having a 
blast doing it.  Her job lets her work from anywhere she can get an 
Internet connection, so as she and her friends planned the trip, that was 
one requirement they had for anywhere they stayed.  They've found some 
amazing places to stay (we had a video chat while she was in Andorra last 
week) that aren't costing a lot of money.

She could have taken the attitude that "life's complicated" and "I can't 
do that", but she didn't - she found a way to make the trip happen in a 
way that's working for her, working for the company we work for, and 
working for her friends on the trip with her.

> I don't know... now every time I feel slightly tired or my feed ache
> slightly or anything, I just feel like I'm completely falling apart.
> Like my youth is over and I'll never feel fit and healthy ever again...

Well, you're not.  You're, what, 30-ish?  You're still new to the game.  
I know it feels like it (when I was 30, I used to get royally pissed off 
at people older than me treating me like I was still a kid, and that I 
had no experience.  Now I'm in my mid-40's, and I try not to treat people 
the way I felt I was treated, but it is actually not easy to want to 
share experience.  I know now that they were making it up as they went 
along, just as I am now).

I have a new boss - she started two weeks ago.  She asked me what I want 
to do - if I've thought about 'x' in terms of career path.  My answer was 
that my career has been varied and pretty much has gone "where the wind 
blows".  I like learning new things, and I'm not risk-averse (but I also 
am not careless about risks - they're always calculated risks, and 
generally have paid off pretty well).  But the thing I've learned is that 
there comes a point where you have to stop thinking and calculating and 
just do the thing that you're thinking about.

Can it blow up on you?  Sure.  That's sometimes what happens.  When it 
does, you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start over.

>>> The daft thing is... my grandfather himself seems to be the only
>>> person in the family who's *not* terribly upset about all this. For
>>> somebody who now can't do anything, he seems remarkably cheerful...
>>
>> That's not uncommon, actually.
> 
> Hmm. He's probably just enjoying not doing the washing up ever day.

Could be, or it could be that he's reliving the good memories.  My dad 
did that a lot in his final years - it helped him deal with the fact that 
sometimes he couldn't remember what he was working on.

> He may not be able to talk much, but he's still the cheeky old rascal
> he's always been. (Last time I visited, he wanted us to smuggle in a gin
> and tonic...)

Even though I don't know him, give him one from me, and raise a glass to 
him in my absence.  Sounds like an amazing guy. :)

Jim



-- 
"I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and 
besides, the pig likes it." - George Bernard Shaw

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