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Uh, I mean "Dell".
At one point, I was given a new account manager. Somebody who actually
speaks English, and who gives a **** about trying to keep me happy.
Unfortunately, I have somehow lost him and been put back with the
Iranian guy who doesn't speak English properly and is only interested in
getting money out of me (and not, for example, actually delivering the
products I've paid for).
Yesterday I received the following email:
Are you in a position to order this today .
I'm in office till 5:30 GMT
The message was sent as plain text. Note how every word has *two* spaces
instead of one. Note also the space before the full-stop (which should
obviously have been a question mark anyway). Note the lack of
punctuation in the second sentence.
Note also that the current timezone in the UK is actually BST, which is
GMT+1. Now I'm left wondering whether he *actually* meant 5:30 GMT, or
whether he in fact meant 5:30 BST (which would be 4:30 GMT).
If only I could figure out how to get rid of this loser and get back the
*good* account manager. Or better yet, how to get rid of Dell completely
and deal with a *professional* hardware supplier...
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Greetings from DELL!!!
Thank you for your email.
I am currently out of office and have no access to my mailbox. I will
Respond to your email on my return to office on 23/08/11 at 09 AM
Is it just me?
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Why don't you answer him in Iranian if his English isn't that good? Oh wait...
Invisible <voi### [at] dev null> wrote:
> Uh, I mean "Dell".
>
>
>
> At one point, I was given a new account manager. Somebody who actually
> speaks English, and who gives a **** about trying to keep me happy.
>
> Unfortunately, I have somehow lost him and been put back with the
> Iranian guy who doesn't speak English properly and is only interested in
> getting money out of me (and not, for example, actually delivering the
> products I've paid for).
>
> Yesterday I received the following email:
>
> Are you in a position to order this today .
> I'm in office till 5:30 GMT
>
> The message was sent as plain text. Note how every word has *two* spaces
> instead of one. Note also the space before the full-stop (which should
> obviously have been a question mark anyway). Note the lack of
> punctuation in the second sentence.
>
> Note also that the current timezone in the UK is actually BST, which is
> GMT+1. Now I'm left wondering whether he *actually* meant 5:30 GMT, or
> whether he in fact meant 5:30 BST (which would be 4:30 GMT).
>
> If only I could figure out how to get rid of this loser and get back the
> *good* account manager. Or better yet, how to get rid of Dell completely
> and deal with a *professional* hardware supplier...
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On 23/08/2011 10:12 AM, Roman Reiner wrote:
> Why don't you answer him in Iranian if his English isn't that good? Oh wait...
He gets paid to be good at English. I don't get paid to be good at
Iranian. :-P
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"Roman Reiner" <lim### [at] gmxde> wrote:
> Why don't you answer him in Iranian if his English isn't that good? Oh wait...
>
I asked myself... "Hmm, is Iranian a specific language?" and realized I needed
to check. Although the simple answer is "no", the particulars struck me as
rather interesting so I thought I would share them. Found here:
http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/articles/article/Iran/Language-in-Iran/121
Best Regards,
Mike C.
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Le 2011-08-23 04:13, Invisible a écrit :
>
> If only I could figure out how to get rid of this loser and get back the
> *good* account manager. Or better yet, how to get rid of Dell completely
> and deal with a *professional* hardware supplier...
Maybe it's just me, but shouldn't you be more interested in his
technical abilities, rather than his punctuation?
When you go to the store to buy something, do you chose the clerk with
the best tie, or the one who knows his stuff? (Assuming you are not
there to get counselling on ties...)
This being said, appearance and competence are not mutually exclusive;
the most knowledgeable salesperson, may also be the one with the most
amazing cleavage!
--
/*Francois Labreque*/#local a=x+y;#local b=x+a;#local c=a+b;#macro P(F//
/* flabreque */L)polygon{5,F,F+z,L+z,L,F pigment{rgb 9}}#end union
/* @ */{P(0,a)P(a,b)P(b,c)P(2*a,2*b)P(2*b,b+c)P(b+c,<2,3>)
/* gmail.com */}camera{orthographic location<6,1.25,-6>look_at a }
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On 23/08/2011 02:28 PM, Francois Labreque wrote:
> Le 2011-08-23 04:13, Invisible a écrit :
>>
>> If only I could figure out how to get rid of this loser and get back the
>> *good* account manager. Or better yet, how to get rid of Dell completely
>> and deal with a *professional* hardware supplier...
>
> Maybe it's just me, but shouldn't you be more interested in his
> technical abilities, rather than his punctuation?
If I can't understand what he's saying, and he can't understand what I'm
saying, what does it matter how knowledgeable he is? I'm still not going
to get what I want.
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On 8/23/2011 3:41 AM, Invisible wrote:
> Greetings from DELL!!!
>
> Thank you for your email.
> I am currently out of office and have no access to my mailbox. I will
> Respond to your email on my return to office on 23/08/11 at 09 AM
>
>
>
> Is it just me?
>
Are you sure he's not a bereaved son of a Nigerian prince?
--
~Mike
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On 8/23/2011 4:34 AM, Invisible wrote:
> On 23/08/2011 10:12 AM, Roman Reiner wrote:
>> Why don't you answer him in Iranian if his English isn't that good? Oh
>> wait...
>
> He gets paid to be good at English. I don't get paid to be good at
> Iranian. :-P
You do now XD
--
~Mike
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On 8/23/2011 6:18 AM, Mike the Elder wrote:
> "Roman Reiner"<lim### [at] gmxde> wrote:
>> Why don't you answer him in Iranian if his English isn't that good? Oh wait...
>>
> I asked myself... "Hmm, is Iranian a specific language?" and realized I needed
> to check. Although the simple answer is "no", the particulars struck me as
> rather interesting so I thought I would share them. Found here:
>
> http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/articles/article/Iran/Language-in-Iran/121
>
> Best Regards,
> Mike C.
>
>
>
>
I didn't read the link, but Farsi, innit?
--
~Mike
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>> Is it just me?
>
> Are you sure he's not a bereaved son of a Nigerian prince?
Ha! You win the internets!
--
http://blog.orphi.me.uk/
http://www.zazzle.com/MathematicalOrchid*
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On Tue, 23 Aug 2011 20:42:48 +0100, Orchid XP v8 wrote:
>>> Is it just me?
>>
>> Are you sure he's not a bereaved son of a Nigerian prince?
>
> Ha! You win the internets!
Damn, *I* wanted to win them - then I could sell them and not worry about
work. ;)
Jim
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On 23/08/2011 09:41 AM, Invisible wrote:
> Is it just me?
...still waiting for an actual reply...
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On 08/25/2011 05:12 AM, Invisible wrote:
> On 23/08/2011 09:41 AM, Invisible wrote:
>
>> Is it just me?
>
> ...still waiting for an actual reply...
LOL ... this is a tough crowd. I was at least expecting a "grow up you
old hippie" response to my rock n roll post ;-)
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On 25/08/2011 09:43 AM, Jim Holsenback wrote:
> On 08/25/2011 05:12 AM, Invisible wrote:
>> On 23/08/2011 09:41 AM, Invisible wrote:
>>
>>> Is it just me?
>>
>> ...still waiting for an actual reply...
>
> LOL ... this is a tough crowd. I was at least expecting a "grow up you
> old hippie" response to my rock n roll post ;-)
No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
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On 08/25/2011 06:16 AM, Invisible wrote:
> On 25/08/2011 09:43 AM, Jim Holsenback wrote:
>> On 08/25/2011 05:12 AM, Invisible wrote:
>>> On 23/08/2011 09:41 AM, Invisible wrote:
>>>
>>>> Is it just me?
>>>
>>> ...still waiting for an actual reply...
>>
>> LOL ... this is a tough crowd. I was at least expecting a "grow up you
>> old hippie" response to my rock n roll post ;-)
>
> No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
>
Hang onto that optimism
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>> No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
>>
> Hang onto that optimism
Yeah, well, I'm only offering to buy £1,000 of hardware from them. It's
not like I'd expect them to, you know, *care* or anything...
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On 8/25/2011 3:46, Invisible wrote:
>>> No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
>>>
>> Hang onto that optimism
>
> Yeah, well, I'm only offering to buy £1,000 of hardware from them.
It's not
> like I'd expect them to, you know, *care* or anything...
To be fair, that's not really a lot of money.
--
Darren New, San Diego CA, USA (PST)
How come I never get only one kudo?
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On 26/08/2011 01:27 AM, Darren New wrote:
> On 8/25/2011 3:46, Invisible wrote:
>>>> No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
>>>>
>>> Hang onto that optimism
>>
>> Yeah, well, I'm only offering to buy £1,000 of hardware from them.
>> It's not
>> like I'd expect them to, you know, *care* or anything...
>
> To be fair, that's not really a lot of money.
It's more than a months' wages for me...
But yeah, I get the feeling that since we don't order multi-million
dollars worth of hardware every other week, Dell just doesn't give a
damn about us. (Remind me... WHY are we still using these losers?)
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On 08/26/2011 04:56 AM, Invisible wrote:
> On 26/08/2011 01:27 AM, Darren New wrote:
>> On 8/25/2011 3:46, Invisible wrote:
>>>>> No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
>>>>>
>>>> Hang onto that optimism
>>>
>>> Yeah, well, I'm only offering to buy £1,000 of hardware from them.
>>> It's not
>>> like I'd expect them to, you know, *care* or anything...
>>
>> To be fair, that's not really a lot of money.
>
> It's more than a months' wages for me...
>
> But yeah, I get the feeling that since we don't order multi-million
> dollars worth of hardware every other week, Dell just doesn't give a
> damn about us. (Remind me... WHY are we still using these losers?)
Have you considered checking out some of the HP deals that are starting
to surface? I'm seriously considering a tablet.
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>> But yeah, I get the feeling that since we don't order multi-million
>> dollars worth of hardware every other week, Dell just doesn't give a
>> damn about us. (Remind me... WHY are we still using these losers?)
>
> Have you considered checking out some of the HP deals that are starting
> to surface? I'm seriously considering a tablet.
Yeah, the IT department was saying something about HP shutting down its
computer department or something, so they've got some good deals going.
Of course, I don't get to make supplier decisions. It's just my job to
order the stuff. (Since Dell US is apparently incapable of telling Dell
UK to supply things...)
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On 26/08/2011 9:08 AM, Jim Holsenback wrote:
> Have you considered checking out some of the HP deals that are starting
> to surface? I'm seriously considering a tablet.
There are rumours that it has sold out in the UK
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-14633434
--
Regards
Stephen
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>> No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
>>
> Hang onto that optimism
Well holy hell...
I forget exactly when I told them I wanted to proceed with the order. To
date, I haven't received an order confirmation or a delivery estimate or
any information at all. I presumed they just didn't get my email. And
today... the product I ordered arrived. And I still haven't seen an
invoice yet. WTF?
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Le 2011-08-30 08:53, Invisible a écrit :
>>> No, I meant... an actual reply from Dell. :-P
>>>
>> Hang onto that optimism
>
> Well holy hell...
>
> I forget exactly when I told them I wanted to proceed with the order. To
> date, I haven't received an order confirmation or a delivery estimate or
> any information at all. I presumed they just didn't get my email. And
> today... the product I ordered arrived. And I still haven't seen an
> invoice yet. WTF?
Didn't Dell's entire business model revolve around making orders online,
or did I dream that bit?
If so, why are you wasting your time interacting with a human being?
--
/*Francois Labreque*/#local a=x+y;#local b=x+a;#local c=a+b;#macro P(F//
/* flabreque */L)polygon{5,F,F+z,L+z,L,F pigment{rgb 9}}#end union
/* @ */{P(0,a)P(a,b)P(b,c)P(2*a,2*b)P(2*b,b+c)P(b+c,<2,3>)
/* gmail.com */}camera{orthographic location<6,1.25,-6>look_at a }
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On 31/08/2011 02:42 AM, Francois Labreque wrote:
> Didn't Dell's entire business model revolve around making orders online,
> or did I dream that bit?
I have no idea. I don't follow things like business models closely.
> If so, why are you wasting your time interacting with a human being?
I haven't yet discovered a way to order online without credit card
details. (Whereas if I order from a human, they send an invoice to our
finance department. You know, like real commercial interactions usually
work...)
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Le 2011-08-31 04:41, Invisible a écrit :
> On 31/08/2011 02:42 AM, Francois Labreque wrote:
>
>> Didn't Dell's entire business model revolve around making orders online,
>> or did I dream that bit?
>
> I have no idea. I don't follow things like business models closely.
>
>> If so, why are you wasting your time interacting with a human being?
>
> I haven't yet discovered a way to order online without credit card
> details. (Whereas if I order from a human, they send an invoice to our
> finance department. You know, like real commercial interactions usually
> work...)
There are things such as corporate credit cards, and many companies also
have online ordering systems where you can order stuff and then let
their finance people talk to your finance people. This usually requires
predefined arrangements, secured logins, etc... You don't just go to
www.dell.co.uk and order 2 dozen rack-mounted servers.
--
/*Francois Labreque*/#local a=x+y;#local b=x+a;#local c=a+b;#macro P(F//
/* flabreque */L)polygon{5,F,F+z,L+z,L,F pigment{rgb 9}}#end union
/* @ */{P(0,a)P(a,b)P(b,c)P(2*a,2*b)P(2*b,b+c)P(b+c,<2,3>)
/* gmail.com */}camera{orthographic location<6,1.25,-6>look_at a }
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