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When some website goes to "page not found" while processing your payment,
and then it costs 1 pound per minute to call their internet help line, and
you have to wait for 9 minutes to speak to anyone.
When you get a packet or tin of something that says pull/tear here, only
it's physically impossible to actually pull/tear without making a huge mess.
You just wish you could get the person who designed such a system to come
and show you how to do it, and hope that they cover themselves with tuna
fish and curry sauce, or snap those headphones in half as they are trying to
prise apart two layers of 1mm thick plastic glued together with industrial
strength adhesive.
When you're too busy to do anything fun.
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scott wrote:
> When you get a packet or tin of something that says pull/tear here, only
> it's physically impossible to actually pull/tear without making a huge
> mess. You just wish you could get the person who designed such a system
> to come and show you how to do it, and hope that they cover themselves
> with tuna fish and curry sauce, or snap those headphones in half as they
> are trying to prise apart two layers of 1mm thick plastic glued together
> with industrial strength adhesive.
If you search YouTube, you can probably find that video of the executive
demonstrating how easy it is to open the new cartons of milk. (I.e., it
isn't.)
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"scott" <sco### [at] scott com> wrote:
> When you get a packet or tin of something that says pull/tear here, only
> it's physically impossible to actually pull/tear without making a huge mess.
> You just wish you could get the person who designed such a system to come
> and show you how to do it, and hope that they cover themselves with tuna
> fish and curry sauce, or snap those headphones in half as they are trying to
> prise apart two layers of 1mm thick plastic glued together with industrial
> strength adhesive.
>
Always have a sharp knife to hand (No Glasgow jokes please, Andrew)
I always carry a small but sharp penknife for opening things.
Stephen
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Stephen wrote:
> Always have a sharp knife to hand (No Glasgow jokes please, Andrew)
Don't look at me! When somebody says Glasgow, I just think about the
famous Haskell compiler...
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Invisible <voi### [at] devnull> wrote:
> Stephen wrote:
>
> > Always have a sharp knife to hand (No Glasgow jokes please, Andrew)
>
> Don't look at me! When somebody says Glasgow, I just think about the
> famous Haskell compiler...
Well that is better than thinking about the Glasgow Coma Scale.
Stephen
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And lo on Thu, 25 Sep 2008 16:16:46 +0100, Stephen <mcavoys_AT_aolDOT.com>
did spake, saying:
> "scott" <sco### [at] scottcom> wrote:
>
>> When you get a packet or tin of something that says pull/tear here, only
>> it's physically impossible to actually pull/tear without making a huge
>> mess.
>
> Always have a sharp knife to hand (No Glasgow jokes please, Andrew)
> I always carry a small but sharp penknife for opening things.
Aren't those classed as offensive weapons now; I heard Glasgow jokes were
one of the biggest causes of death in some parts of Scotland?
--
Phil Cook
--
I once tried to be apathetic, but I just couldn't be bothered
http://flipc.blogspot.com
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On Fri, 26 Sep 2008 16:19:14 +0100, "Phil Cook"
<phi### [at] nospamrocainfreeservecouk> wrote:
>
>Aren't those classed as offensive weapons now; I heard Glasgow jokes were
>one of the biggest causes of death in some parts of Scotland?
I don't know the current regulations/laws but the blade on mine is only 1 ¼
inches long. It also has a nail file and a tiny pair of scissors so I could give
you a pretty vicious manicure. The knife blade is always kept sharp enough to
cut paper.
As for the Glasgow jokes, received wisdom says it's classed as suicide ;)
--
Regards
Stephen
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Stephen wrote:
> On Fri, 26 Sep 2008 16:19:14 +0100, "Phil Cook"
> <phi### [at] nospamrocainfreeservecouk> wrote:
>
>>
>>Aren't those classed as offensive weapons now; I heard Glasgow jokes were
>>one of the biggest causes of death in some parts of Scotland?
>
> I don't know the current regulations/laws but the blade on mine is only 1
> ¼ inches long. It also has a nail file and a tiny pair of scissors so I
> could give you a pretty vicious manicure. The knife blade is always kept
> sharp enough to cut paper.
I think Phil said the *jokes* are offensive weapons :)
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On Fri, 26 Sep 2008 18:22:41 -0300, Nicolas Alvarez <nic### [at] gmailcom>
wrote:
>
>I think Phil said the *jokes* are offensive weapons :)
He might have but who can tell with a Brum accent? :)
--
Regards
Stephen
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Stephen wrote:
> On Fri, 26 Sep 2008 18:22:41 -0300, Nicolas Alvarez <nic### [at] gmailcom>
> wrote:
>
>> I think Phil said the *jokes* are offensive weapons :)
>
> He might have but who can tell with a Brum accent? :)
Sorry, could you repeat that a bit more slowly. Did you say it in Gaelic?
John (speaking RP)
--
"Eppur si muove" - Galileo Galilei
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On Sat, 27 Sep 2008 10:41:00 +0100, Doctor John <joh### [at] homecom> wrote:
>Stephen wrote:
>> On Fri, 26 Sep 2008 18:22:41 -0300, Nicolas Alvarez <nic### [at] gmailcom>
>> wrote:
>>
>>> I think Phil said the *jokes* are offensive weapons :)
>>
>> He might have but who can tell with a Brum accent? :)
>Sorry, could you repeat that a bit more slowly. Did you say it in Gaelic?
>
>John (speaking RP)
Seeyoujimmie, doesyermithersew?
Weel giter tay sew this ya bammpot!
:)
--
Regards
Stephen
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Stephen wrote:
>
> Seeyoujimmie, doesyermithersew?
> Weel giter tay sew this ya bammpot!
>
> :)
omg, violence on p.o-t :-)
John
--
"Eppur si muove" - Galileo Galilei
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On Sat, 27 Sep 2008 11:45:42 +0100, Doctor John <joh### [at] homecom> wrote:
>Stephen wrote:
>>
>> Seeyoujimmie, doesyermithersew?
>> Weel giter tay sew this ya bammpot!
>>
>> :)
>
>omg, violence on p.o-t :-)
>
>John
No a sign of affection :)
--
Regards
Stephen
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And lo on Fri, 26 Sep 2008 17:36:39 +0100, Stephen <mcavoysAT@aolDOTcom>
did spake, saying:
> On Fri, 26 Sep 2008 16:19:14 +0100, "Phil Cook"
> <phi### [at] nospamrocainfreeservecouk> wrote:
>
>>
>> Aren't those classed as offensive weapons now; I heard Glasgow jokes
>> were
>> one of the biggest causes of death in some parts of Scotland?
>
> I don't know the current regulations/laws but the blade on mine is only
> 1 ¼ inches long. It also has a nail file and a tiny pair of scissors so
> I could give you a pretty vicious manicure. The knife blade is always
> kept sharp enough to cut paper.
Anything with a blade or a point except a folding knife unless it has an
edge over 3 inches in length. That said you can get away with it if it's
for either a) work, b) education, c) religion, or d) national costume;
note that e) hobby doesn't appear so extreme whittlers can be locked up
for the safety of us all.
> As for the Glasgow jokes, received wisdom says it's classed as suicide ;)
Nicolas managed to decipher my thick Brummie accent correctly.
--
Phil Cook
--
I once tried to be apathetic, but I just couldn't be bothered
http://flipc.blogspot.com
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On Mon, 29 Sep 2008 14:22:52 +0100, "Phil Cook"
<phi### [at] nospamrocainfreeservecouk> wrote:
>Anything with a blade or a point except a folding knife unless it has an
>edge over 3 inches in length. That said you can get away with it if it's
>for either a) work, b) education, c) religion, or d) national costume;
>note that e) hobby doesn't appear so extreme whittlers can be locked up
>for the safety of us all.
>
I'm from Glesgie so that makes it c) religion, d) national costume, if I tuck it
in my sock and a) work, if you go back a few decades.
So I'm probably safe from Stop And Search. Do you know how hard it is to cut
paper at least with a clean edge?
>> As for the Glasgow jokes, received wisdom says it's classed as suicide ;)
>
>Nicolas managed to decipher my thick Brummie accent correctly.
You're lucky, no one understands me except for my wife and she understands me
only too well ;)
--
Regards
Stephen
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