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Inumerable people have given me advice on how to socialise. And yet, I
still can't do it. (Much to my frustration!)
I'm beginning to wonder whether socialising is like salsa.
Let me explain what I was taught in my salsa lesson:
- Stand with your feet together.
- Take a step forward with your right foot.
- Stop.
- Bring your right foot back again.
- Stop.
- Take a step backwards with your left foot.
- Stop.
- Bring your left foot back again.
- Stop.
Does that sound hard? No, not really.
Does it *look* hard? Again, no.
*Is* it hard? Weirdly enough... yes. It's *very* hard. And utterly
exhausting too. (But that's probably because I usually remain completely
motionless for months on end. Normal people probably wouldn't have this
problem.)
If I'd have read a book telling me how to salsa, I'd have thought "oh,
that's easy", and that would be the end of it. Only when I tried to
actually *do* this stuff did I begin to comprehend what's supposed to
happen.
Maybe interacting with humans is like that? Maybe you can only
understand it once you experience it for yourself. Maybe it's not
possible to "explain" it with words. Perhaps you can only learn by
*doing* this stuff for real, and having somebody *show* you rather than
just *tell* you.
I guess that would explain my complete failure to learn this stuff... :-S
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Invisible escreveu:
> Maybe interacting with humans is like that? Maybe you can only
> understand it once you experience it for yourself. Maybe it's not
> possible to "explain" it with words. Perhaps you can only learn by
> *doing* this stuff for real, and having somebody *show* you rather than
> just *tell* you.
Yes. The salsa example is perfect: you can't rationalize about salsa
while you're in the middle of it, you'll get it wrong. Don't think too
much about it -- and I know it's hard for us geeks -- and you'll do
fine. It's like walking too: you don't go thinking about rising your
foot, moving it forward, keeping balance etc.
Just get near someone and go like: "Hey, nice shirt!" or "Some weather,
huh?" or "What did you have for lunch today?" and "Whew! The world has
gone bonkers" or any other familiar nonsense. The rest should come out
naturally. Just don't think too much about it, go chaining the words in
the replies with new ideas and, presto!, some random conversation is
built. I find it a good algorithm. ;)
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"Invisible" <voi### [at] dev null> wrote in message
news:492fe8f7$1@news.povray.org...
> Inumerable people have given me advice on how to socialise.
There's an irony here somewhere.
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>> Inumerable people have given me advice on how to socialise.
>
> There's an irony here somewhere.
Hmm, you may have something there...
--
http://blog.orphi.me.uk/
http://www.zazzle.com/MathematicalOrchid*
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On Fri, 28 Nov 2008 12:49:57 +0000, Invisible wrote:
> Maybe interacting with humans is like that? Maybe you can only
> understand it once you experience it for yourself.
Practice makes perfect.
Jim
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Jim Henderson wrote:
>
> Practice makes perfect.
Actually, it doesn't. It makes one to suck less.
> Jim
-Aero
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On Mon, 01 Dec 2008 21:17:15 +0200, Eero Ahonen wrote:
> Jim Henderson wrote:
>>
>> Practice makes perfect.
>
> Actually, it doesn't. It makes one to suck less.
Well, if I were to go totally geek on it, practice is an effort to reach
a limit (mathematically) - so enough practice makes perfect, but it's
only as x approaches infinity that you actually get there.
So I guess that's pretty much what you said. ;-)
Jim
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Jim Henderson wrote:
> Well, if I were to go totally geek on it, practice is an effort to reach
> a limit (mathematically) - so enough practice makes perfect, but it's
> only as x approaches infinity that you actually get there.
>
> So I guess that's pretty much what you said. ;-)
Well *actually*... practising DOING IT RIGHT makes perfect. If you end
up practising it wrong (e.g., you practise your golf swing, but always
get it wrong) it actually makes things worse.
Or so the scientists have concluded...
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Invisible wrote:
>
> Well *actually*... practising DOING IT RIGHT makes perfect.
No. There are still faults in it. It's practically impossible to take
care of every little thing that matters in it. Practicing can make to
The Best, but not The Perfect.
> If you end
> up practising it wrong (e.g., you practise your golf swing, but always
> get it wrong) it actually makes things worse.
True.
-Aero
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Eero Ahonen wrote:
>> If you end
>> up practising it wrong (e.g., you practise your golf swing, but always
>> get it wrong) it actually makes things worse.
>
> True.
Well, that was my main point anyway. ;-)
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