> Have to agree with Darren, I've heard stupider.

Oh, sure, I've heard _worse_.

These aren't stupid on the scale of Verizon Math Fail, but stupid on the 
scale of "for goodness sake, go away and stop pestering me!"

>> Yesterday almost nobody spoke to me.
> 
>> Since thing the day before.
> 
> Have I missed something?

No, but I apparently missed a couple of keys on my keyboard.

(That should of course be "same thing the day before".)

>> But today, everybody seems to want to ask silly questions.
>>
>> My mum called me to ask whether to leave the birthday card I haven't 
>> signed yet at home so that I can sign it. (Duh.)
> 
> Or should she fake your signature so as to get it in the post, or shall 
> she bring it down to you, or should she give it to X to pass on to you. 
> Context is king.

Well, since I'll be home in an hour or so and I'm coming to where the 
card needs to be taken... it's fairly self-evident that leaving the card 
there is the thing to do. (The alternative I suppose is to take the card 
over there blank and I'll sign it when I get there - but this seems less 
optimal.)

>> My grandad phoned to ask where my mum is, but I was driving, and by 
>> the time I'd stopped driving and had a chance to call him back, he'd 
>> found her anyway.
> 
> Hardly stupid unless you were out of the country to which the answer 
> would be "How the hell should I know?"

Well, you know, I almost *never* know where the hell my mother is. Why 
ask me? Phone her! (In retrospect, maybe they did. She never ****ing 
answers anyway...)

>> One of our project managers asked me what the difference between 
>> "tab-deliminted text file" and "pipe-delimited text file" is.
> 
> Again if you know what delimited means you can guess, but if you don't 
> "what's a pipe?"

I'm still trying to figure out why the hell she wanted to know, but 
anyway...

>> But so far, at just after 2PM, the current winner is this:
>>
>>    "How can I convert milivolts to microsiemens?"
> 
> Well, we all have off days.

This was the least-stupid question of them all, IMHO.

(It turns out we have a machine that takes measurements in microseimens, 
but some software we use needs a value in milivolts. And while they are 
completely different dimensions, if you knew the properties of the 
machine, it's conceivable that a constant conversion factor actually 
exists...)

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