On 13-8-2010 19:16, andrel wrote:

> There are also many of them that think they are actually better drivers 
> because they have more experience. Anyway I am just setting thing up for 
> the last line. Any objection you raise against this part is most 
> probably going to support the conclusion.

Here is my problem. The structure of that text is that it starts with a 
hopefully interesting observation. Then follows a part that is 
deliberately fuzzy and open for attacks from anywhere. It ends with 
something that is meant as a sort of punchline. It should come as a 
surprise and make the reader realize that all objections he or she had 
while reading the previous paragraph have some counterpart in how 
science is judges and granted. That should give the reader a new angle 
to look at the participation of women in science and engineering. Only, 
that is not going to happen, so this structure obviously does not work. :(
I don't know how to do it right though. Taking the reader by the hand 
and pointing out the obvious and less obvious parallels makes the text 
even longer while it also spoils the fun for me and that lonely soul 
that did get the implicit message.

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